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Uni Watch: Now With Sparkles!

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Every four years, gymnastics — much like figure skating — comes out of storage to capture the hearts of American women ages 14-64. Other than those three weeks of the winter or summer Olympics, who watches gymnastics or figure skating? That’s not rhetorical, by the way. Seriously, who watches this stuff?

The two sweethearts of the springboard — actually the uneven parallel bars, but feel free to substitute the apparatus of your choice — pictured here are Shawn Johnson and Nastia Liukin in this weekend’s Visa Championships in Boston. How do I know which is which? Why, a sequined shoulder monogram, of course. — Bryan

 

50 comments to Uni Watch: Now With Sparkles!

  • Ricko | June 8, 2008 at 7:35 am |

    Hmmmm…sure hope we don’t have to start asking ourselves which is worst, logo creep or sequin creep. Considering the little “VISA” on the pink lady, this may be glittering example of both.

    Kinda makes you wanna spend the day watching “ALF, the First Season”, doesn’t it? And that’s NOT rhethorical. Come to think of it, seeing the cat-craving alien from Melmac again sounds like fun. Certainly more fun that gymnastics-turned-dance-recital.

    One question: Are the men’s gymnastics unis that precious? (rolls eyes)

  • seven | June 8, 2008 at 8:17 am |

    My wife is a former gymnast so we watch whenever gymnastics is on tv. It’s the only time she gets passionate about unis. For the record she would like to see gymnasts lose the scunchies, glitter & super-tight pony tails. I don’t know all the details, but there are specific rules for uniforms. In training the girls wear sleeveless leotards, but you have to wear long-sleeves in competition. Apparently they use a sticky spray to prevent leotard wedgies & if you can believe ‘Stick It’ there is a deduction if your bra strap is showing.

    Incidentally the competition/rivalry between Liukin & Johnson is fascinating & it will be intriguing to see how they relate as team-mates.

  • Taha | June 8, 2008 at 8:23 am |

    [quote comment=”274535″]…Apparently they use a sticky spray to prevent leotard wedgies & if you can believe ‘Stick It’ there is a deduction if your bra strap is showing.
    [/quote]
    what gets sprayed? their behinds or the leotard? I’m sure they would get an increase in ratings (esp in the males 12-25 and the prison population) if they DIDN’T use this spray.

  • Ricko | June 8, 2008 at 8:27 am |

    For the record, I have nothing against gymnastics. Like any other sport, there can be moments of extraordinary drama.

    I’m just not so thrilled with spangles, baubles and beads.

    Then again, I suppose in a way all of sports is a “performance art,” whether we wanna accept that notion or not.

  • Mike Engle | June 8, 2008 at 9:37 am |

    How did we let Adidas off the hook?
    I spy up to four triple stripe creeps. Three white strips on Liukin’s upper chest, three glittery sleeve stripes on Liukin’s right sleeve, Johnson’s back logo, and three stripes of black electric tape on Johnson’s right forearm. (It might not be electric tape, but that’s what it looks like. It’s probably not tefillin. Darn.)

  • Mike Engle | June 8, 2008 at 9:51 am |

    In other news, Uni Watch has an obscure SI.com spin-off in the form of Gennaro Filice’s “‘Stache Watch.”

  • Michael | June 8, 2008 at 10:10 am |

    And in helmet/facemask related news… looks like Scott Player’s bid to wear the single bar has been rebuuffed by the league

    http://www.boston.co...

  • The Ol Goaler | June 8, 2008 at 10:26 am |

    [quote comment=”274536″][quote comment=”274535″]…Apparently they use a sticky spray to prevent leotard wedgies & if you can believe ‘Stick It’ there is a deduction if your bra strap is showing.
    [/quote]
    what gets sprayed? their behinds or the leotard? I’m sure they would get an increase in ratings (esp in the males 12-25 and the prison population) if they DIDN’T use this spray.[/quote]
    A-hem… According to a friend of mine who used to compete in beauty pageants, one sprays one’s backside with “stickum” to prevent swimsuit bottoms from “riding up”. My guess is gymnasts do the same.

    BTW, don’t try to make fun of male gymnasts… they’re incredibly strong for their size; the better to perform stuff like this

  • Patrick | June 8, 2008 at 11:01 am |

    There goes Bryan, picking on the kids again ;-)

    /where’s my sarcasm button?!

  • James Craven | June 8, 2008 at 11:37 am |

    What the hell is this? My Little Pony Live? I think there’s other reason men like women’s gymnastics if you know what I mean!

  • Dennis Abrams | June 8, 2008 at 11:45 am |

    I don’t think it’s fair to pair figure skating with gymnastics. Figure skating has to be at least twice as popular as gymnastics.

  • JD | June 8, 2008 at 11:49 am |

    #2: Yeah, right. You’re asking us to believe that these prepubescent ladies need bras?

  • CJ | June 8, 2008 at 12:06 pm |

    [quote comment=”274543″]What the hell is this? My Little Pony Live? I think there’s other reason men like women’s gymnastics if you know what I mean![/quote]

    This conversation grows more awkward with every post. . .

  • Rob T | June 8, 2008 at 12:24 pm |

    You’ll like this: the Colorado Rapids’ shorts (and only their shorts) got lost by the airline, so they wore Chivas USA’s blue bottoms. Here’s a better look.

  • T.J. | June 8, 2008 at 1:01 pm |

    Well, here’s me going off topic.

    Really good pic of the Chicago Cubs helmet logo being made of fabric and not just a plain sticker-like thing.

    here

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 1:17 pm |

    Wait…Big Brown didn’t win the Triple Crown? Huh. That’s odd. I was led to believe he’d win the Triple Crown by people who know horse racing.

  • wescovington | June 8, 2008 at 1:19 pm |

    Too bad the Croatians have to wear the blue kit today. Not nearly enough checkerboards for my taste.

  • random reader | June 8, 2008 at 1:45 pm |

    Braves have their Sunday alternate caps (“A” with tomahawk) but manager Bobby Cox is still wearing the standard Braves cap

  • =bg= | June 8, 2008 at 1:47 pm |

    Little girls in leotards. Creepy thread. Seeyatomorrow.

  • Ron V | June 8, 2008 at 1:50 pm |

    Orioles are wearing a black arm band for Jim Mckay I presume. Mc Kay was a Baltimore guy and a part owner of the Orioles. The band is very subtle.

  • Mike | June 8, 2008 at 2:11 pm |

    I don’t have a picture, and this was probably already mentioned in yesterday’s comments, but Luis Ayala was wearing his “W” cap while his teammates wore the alternated “DC” cap last night against the Giants. Displeased, the baseball gods made him blow the game.

  • Glen S | June 8, 2008 at 2:53 pm |

    Another on time delivery by UPS.

    Big Brown finishes last.

  • Ricko | June 8, 2008 at 2:55 pm |

    Florida State wearing their “champagne” pants. Kinda nice if not part of regular diet, I suppose.

  • Phil | June 8, 2008 at 4:23 pm |

    One of the top stories on telegraph.co.uk right now is:

    New Arsenal home kit persuades Cesc Fabregas to stay at the Emirates

    http://www.telegraph...

    No pictures available on the Arsenal site so far though – just the one on the telegraph link.

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 5:40 pm |

    I actually liked Croatia’s blue. The checkerboard was nice but not overpowering.

    The Poles also had a little blue rectangle on their left sleeves with “RESPECT” (in English) written on it. I didn’t see if it was on anybody else’s shirt. I wonder what that’s about.

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 5:41 pm |

    While you can’t read it, you can see the Poles’ “RESPECT” patch here:

    http://d.yimg.com/a/...

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 5:43 pm |

    Actually, now that I look, it’s possible the Jerrys had it on their shirts as well:

    http://d.yimg.com/us...

    Which would mean it’s a tournament-wide thing.

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 5:44 pm |

    And, to complete the post run, here you can see the Orioles’ black stripe for Jim McKay:
    http://sports.yahoo....

  • rangers85 | June 8, 2008 at 5:54 pm |

    [quote comment=”274552″]Little girls in leotards. Creepy thread. Seeyatomorrow.[/quote]

    If it makes you feel any better, the one on the right is 18 and college freshman.

  • DarkAudit | June 8, 2008 at 5:58 pm |

    [quote comment=”274557″]One of the top stories on telegraph.co.uk right now is:

    New Arsenal home kit persuades Cesc Fabregas to stay at the Emirates

    http://www.telegraph...

    No pictures available on the Arsenal site so far though – just the one on the telegraph link.[/quote]

    They wouldn’t dare. Those things are hideous. They’ve destroyed the traditional Arsenal home look.

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 6:13 pm |

    Oh, and college gymnastics is the way to go if you’re feeling pervy about the olympic-type youngsters.

    College gymnasts have, by and large, peaked and have (usually) actual woman’s bodies. Lithe, yes, but not unhealthy looking.

  • Dre | June 8, 2008 at 6:35 pm |

    [quote comment=\”274564\”]Oh, and college gymnastics is the way to go if you\’re feeling pervy about the olympic-type youngsters.

    College gymnasts have, by and large, peaked and have (usually) actual woman\’s bodies. Lithe, yes, but not unhealthy looking.[/quote]

    I agree! You could also look at These gymnasts and not get creeped out?

  • KT | June 8, 2008 at 6:48 pm |

    Colorado Caribous jersey up on eBay.

    http://cgi.ebay.com/...

  • Richard Bruns | June 8, 2008 at 6:50 pm |

    [quote comment=\”274563\”][quote comment=\”274557\”]One of the top stories on telegraph.co.uk right now is:

    New Arsenal home kit persuades Cesc Fabregas to stay at the Emirates

    http://www.telegraph...

    No pictures available on the Arsenal site so far though – just the one on the telegraph link.[/quote]

    They wouldn\’t dare. Those things are hideous. They\’ve destroyed the traditional Arsenal home look.[/quote]

    They haven’t destroyed it at all. I agree that I’d prefer all white sleeves instead of the wide white stripe down the sleeve but the new kits look good and the low quality pics of the new away kit that I’ve seen look good also.

  • James Craven | June 8, 2008 at 7:59 pm |

    [quote comment=”274546″][quote comment=”274543″]“What the hell is this? My Little Pony Live? I think there’s other reason men like women’s gymnastics if you know what I mean!

    “This conversation grows more awkward with every post…”[/quote][/quote]

    DAMN IT CJ!

  • Brendan | June 8, 2008 at 8:20 pm |

    USA vs. Argetina both in light colored shirts. It’s difficult to tell them apart on TV. No photos yet, stay tuned.

  • LI Phil | June 8, 2008 at 9:07 pm |

    [quote comment=”274535″]My wife is a former gymnast…[/quote]

    you are my hero

  • LI Phil | June 8, 2008 at 9:13 pm |

    reprinted from yesterday’s comments:

    [quote comment=”274509″]A Russian scientist and a Czechoslovakian scientist had spent their whole lives studying the majestic grizzly bear. Each year they petitioned their respective governments to allow them to go to Yellowstone to study these wondrous beasts. Finally, their request was granted and they immediately flew to New York and then west to Yellowstone. They reported to the local ranger station and were told that it was the grizzly mating season and it was much too dangerous to go out and study the animals. They pleaded that this was their only chance. Finally the ranger relented. The Russian and the Czech were given cell phones and told to report in each day.

    For several days they called in, and then nothing was heard from the two scientists. The rangers mounted a search party and found the scientists’ camp completely ravaged. There was no sign of the missing men.

    They then followed the trail of a male and a female bear. They found the female and decided they must kill the animal to find out if she had eaten the scientists, because they feared an international incident. They killed the female and cut open the bear’s stomach and, sure enough, found the remains of the Russian.

    One ranger turned to the other and said, “You know what this means, don’t you?”

    “Of course,” the other ranger nodded. “The Czech is in the male.”[/quote]

    i know you cleaned it up (or did you jim?)…but this is a CLASSIC joke…however, it involves a member of the chosen race in order to actually make it funny…i won’t bore you with all the details here, but the punchline is slightly different

  • Brendan | June 8, 2008 at 9:26 pm |
  • Walker | June 8, 2008 at 10:42 pm |

    [quote comment=”274556″]Florida State wearing their “champagne” pants. Kinda nice if not part of regular diet, I suppose.[/quote]

    They’re part of the regular Sunday uniforms. The Sunday home uniforms are those vegas pants, and when hey’re the road team on Sunday in the tournament (at home,) they wear the pants over garnet tops. They’re wearing the BP tops instead of the regular garnet tops because that’s what they’ve worn as the road team all tournament (not unlike LSU’s gold streak.)

  • James Craven | June 8, 2008 at 10:46 pm |

    Domenik Hasek is expected to retire tomorrow (6/9), and Chris Chellios will soon follow.

    Domenik Hasek and Chris Chellios. You know how old they both are? They’re both 206!

  • LI Phil | June 8, 2008 at 11:01 pm |

    home field advantage?

    or was manny keeping score

  • Tony Miller | June 8, 2008 at 11:13 pm |

    [quote comment=”274575″]home field advantage?

    or was manny keeping score[/quote]

    1 looks very different than 0 in the 6th (that’s what they were missing)…was the operator scared by a rat?

  • Teebz | June 8, 2008 at 11:39 pm |

    [quote comment=”274574″]Domenik Hasek is expected to retire tomorrow (6/9), and Chris Chellios will soon follow.

    Domenik Hasek and Chris Chellios. You know how old they both are? They’re both 206![/quote]

    Chelios has already confirmed that if the Wings want him back as a player, he will return as a player. His retirement is not set in stone.

  • David | June 8, 2008 at 11:44 pm |

    I think I’m just going to comment on here everytime Rajon Rondo wears his headband upside-down. This would be number three I believe.

  • Abe | June 9, 2008 at 12:08 am |

    Don’t know if this has been mentioned before (I didn’t notice it in Game 1), but what was the purple “line” going through Kobe’s number on his back? Kind of like tracing the inside of the block numbers…?

  • Lee | June 9, 2008 at 12:12 am |

    [quote comment=”274558″]I actually liked Croatia’s blue. The checkerboard was nice but not overpowering.

    The Poles also had a little blue rectangle on their left sleeves with “RESPECT” (in English) written on it. I didn’t see if it was on anybody else’s shirt. I wonder what that’s about.[/quote]
    on every shirt in the Euros

  • Johnny O | June 9, 2008 at 12:15 am |

    I don’t know if anyone noticed this or not… but in Game 2 tonight of the NBA Finals, Kobe had serious issues with the back numbers on his jersey. In the first half of the game, they seemed to be fine. But in the 4th quarter, it looked like some stitching was taken out right in the middle of the numbers.

    Here is a pic of Kobe earlier in the game:
    http://d.yimg.com/a/...
    http://d.yimg.com/us...

    Here is a pic of the weird numbering:
    http://d.yimg.com/us...
    http://d.yimg.com/a/...

    Please let me know if this has been discussed before, or if anyone knows what happened here.

  • Thomas | June 9, 2008 at 12:21 am |

    Rondo [i]always[/i] wears his headband upside down. Don’t know why, but he does.

    I would guess the “Respect” bit is part of a European anti-racism push. For all their celebrating of how progressive they are, there are a lot of bad elements still kicking around in those societies.

    And Kobe’s stitching, if that’s what it was, was truly bizarre.

  • rc | June 9, 2008 at 8:00 am |

    [quote comment=”274582″]Rondo [i]always[/i] wears his headband upside down. Don’t know why, but he does.

    I would guess the “Respect” bit is part of a European anti-racism push. For all their celebrating of how progressive they are, there are a lot of bad elements still kicking around in those societies.

    And Kobe’s stitching, if that’s what it was, was truly bizarre.[/quote]

    Respect patch is for the Referees. There is a campaign by UEFA for the players to not call the ref a “F^$#ing C*&$” every time he blows the whistle. It won’t work.